Tag: wisdom

Posted on

Wisdom and Grace in the New Year

Fresno Bee, Dec. 29, 2024

The transition to a new year is an opportunity to begin again. It is also a time to reflect on days gone by. This process is important, and teaches us lessons in virtue. Life is a series of stops and starts. As the calendar changes, we can practice ending well, and beginning again.

Change is difficult. We clutch tightly to the present. We dwell on the past. And we fear the future. The solution is to love without clinging, to live without fear, and when the time comes, to leave without complaint.

The world’s wisdom traditions often describe life as a process of ending and beginning. The Taoist sage Lao-Tzu said, “Death and birth, ending and beginning are nothing more than the sequence of day and night.” He saw good fortune and bad luck as trifling changes in the eternal flow of things.

The geniuses of living are masters at riding that flow. They manage change with skill and grace. They savor what is, cherish what was, and stride confidently into the unfinished future. Virtuous sages recall the past without nostalgia. They greet the dawn with joy. They are grateful for what they receive. And when the time comes to depart, they take a bow and move along.

Ending things requires courage. It hurts to say farewell. But all good things must end. When the party’s over, it’s time for a brave goodbye. It is not wise to linger too long in parting.

The bittersweetness of leaving is simply part of life. Children move out. Careers end. And friends pass away. This is difficult. But there is a stark purity in closing the door on the past. In some cases, the emptiness of the end comes as a relief. In other cases, the end comes too soon, causing profound suffering.

For a Taoist sage, there is the right time to mourn and then it’s time to move along. For the rest of us, it’s not so easy to let go. Grief is part of life. But it should not become an anchor that ties us to what no longer exists.

The challenge is to accept the inevitability of change, while turning a loss into an opportunity. Starting anew requires courage, and a creative spirit. As we make our new year’s resolutions, we seek to innovate and renew. A resolution is a promise to the future.

New challenges will require us to make a few adjustments. We ought to keep our promises. But there is no telling what might happen. The world will throw up impediments to our resolve. There will be good luck and misfortune. We ought to hope to keep an even keel and persevere through these changes.

Virtues like steadfastness and fortitude help us to remain constant and true. But fortitude without flexibility can become stiff. There is value in keeping your resolutions. But the geniuses of living are not slaves to their promises. They have a kind of free intelligence that is both consistent and accommodating. They embrace the next moment with open arms, while also remaining steady.

The Stoic sage Marcus Aurelius taught that we should accept what happens, while staying true. It is easy to lose yourself and lie to yourself. The difficult task is to remain who you are, while going with the flow.

A curious and open mind is essential. This helps us start something new. The curious mind is interested in what the future may bring. A related virtue is zest or enthusiasm. This is creative and forward-looking energy. It is the gusto or ambition that causes you to jump out of bed in the morning and welcome the day.

The new year offers a fresh start. This is an opportunity to erase some bad habits and write a new chapter. It can help to consult ancient wisdom traditions such as Taoism or Stoicism. But books and sayings are less important than common sense.

Life is full of hellos and goodbyes. The challenge of living well is to balance change and continuity. As we make our resolutions and look back on the past year, we should aim to keep what’s good, welcome the better, and let go of what we no longer need.

Read more at: https://www.fresnobee.com/opinion/readers-opinion/article297625698.html#storylink=cpy

Posted on

Tragic Wisdom for Turbulent Times

Fresno Bee, Nov. 16, 2024

The American electoral scene offers some lessons in wisdom: When Trump lost in 2020, Republicans went mad with accusations of a stolen election. Now, it is Democrats who are outraged and wailing in grief and anger.

These wild swings of emotion are a sign of a culture out of balance. Our world is afflicted by an immoderate temper and a lack of wisdom. Part of the problem is the expectation that things will always work out as we want them to. But it is not true that everything happens for a reason, nor is it true that the arc of the universe bends toward justice or that progress and enlightenment are inevitable.

Progress is painstaking and never guaranteed. The crooked timber of humanity cannot be made straight. Corrupt individuals seize power, people make unwise decisions and sometimes evil triumphs over good.

Most of the world’s wisdom traditions affirm this tragic insight: The first truth of Buddhism is that life is suffering, and Christianity requires a bloody sacrifice to wash away the wages of sin.

We should not be surprised when things go wrong. The political world is not a morality play written by a benevolent author. Rather, history unfolds by hook and by crook, as mortal men struggle for power. Acknowledging this ugly feature of human reality can provide some comfort. Suffering is par for the course and no one can escape the agony of defeat.

In stormy times, it helps to consult the tragic wisdom of the ancient philosophers. Aristotle teaches that happiness requires a rare conjunction of wisdom and good fortune. He reminds us to count no one happy until they are dead. He meant that decades of good luck can be destroyed in an instant when things go horribly wrong. And, in fact, Aristotle had to flee for his life as Athens collapsed around him.

The Stoic philosophers cultivated similarly tragic soil. The Roman Stoic Seneca advises us to distrust prosperity, to prepare for adversity and to realize that fortune will do whatever she pleases. Like Aristotle, Seneca was buffeted by political misfortune (he was ordered to kill himself by the emperor Nero).

Stoic sages advise us to stop wailing and complaining. Do not be disturbed by the way things are. Things rarely work out according to plan. This is simply the way of the world. There is nothing you can do about history and the larger forces of the universe.

But you can control your own virtue. You have the power to choose how you respond to life’s tragedies. Key values here are courage, fortitude, resilience and tenacity.

It is important to avoid the despair and anger that appear when we find out that it’s not “all good.” If you expect everything to work out as you want it to, you will be sorely disappointed. You may be tempted to give up or lash out in furious frustration, but it is wiser to acknowledge that things often do go wrong.

Prepare for the worst, and do your best. The only thing in your control is the way you react to life’s vicissitudes.

It is also useful to give thanks when things go well. The good times should be greeted as welcome exceptions rather than the norm. There is usually something to be grateful for, even in a storm.

You should also forgive yourself when you fail. Everyone fails. It’s not easy to be good, so when you do fail, don’t beat yourself up about it — failure is par for the course. The heroes of living respond to failure with tenacity and they keep working at living well, even when the odds are against them.

The true test of character is not found in success. It is found in how well you recover from defeat.

Tragic wisdom offers consolation. Truth, virtue and happiness are rare commodities. The good is often overpowered by falsehood and vice. In this vale of tears, a good life is not guaranteed. It is unusual for intelligence, righteousness and good fortune to converge. But in understanding the fragility of goodness, we discover wisdom. And if we work at it, we can find the strength to remain upright in the face of the storm.

Read more at: https://www.fresnobee.com/opinion/readers-opinion/article295556909.html#storylink=cpy

Posted on

The wisdom of “very demure, very mindful”

Fresno Bee, August 23, 2024

It is best to be modest and mindful. The world’s wisdom traditions teach that a good life should be guided by simplicity and self-examination. But ours is an immodest and excessive culture. Humility and introspection are rare.

So, it is interesting to consider the latest craze on TikTok, where the phrase “very demure, very mindful” is trending. It was popularized by TikTok influencer Jools Lebron, who explained the ideal as “being mindful and considerate of the people around you, but also of yourself and how you present to the world.”

Most of my students laughed when I mentioned the “very demure, very mindful” trend. The whole thing smacks of parody. TikTok mindfulness is done for the cameras with the goal of going viral. Which is, frankly, not demure at all.

Many of the demure and mindful videos are silly and fun. The phrase has taken on a life of its own. For all this online chatter, when I asked my students what “demure” means or why it is important, they generally had no idea. For the record, demure means shy, reserved and modest. Genuine modesty and mindfulness are important for a tranquil life, and as an antidote to the excesses of our era.

Our culture is anything but demure and mindful. The Trumpian age is one of big egos, loud mouths and prominent tattoos. People display themselves in exaggerated ways: Some fly huge flags on cars and houses; everyone is striving to be noticed; and everyone has an angle.

We’ve lost the art of modesty, and we are often unable to tell the difference between dignified truth-telling and the parodies that proliferate on the internet. When everyone is grandstanding, we confuse showmanship with sincerity. If there really were a demure and mindful person in our midst, we might wonder what kind of game they were playing.

This is related to the problem of false modesty. If you brag about how modest you are, you are not really modest. And sometimes those who demurely say, “I’m not worthy,” are really full of themselves.

Genuinely demure people don’t show off. And mindful people are often inconspicuous. It may seem difficult, then, to find them and learn from their virtue. But decent and humble people are all around us. They are rarely the center of attention. If you look past the spotlight, you’ll see them, quietly taking care of business offstage.

Philosophers have often advocated avoiding the spotlight. The ancient followers of Epicurus retreated from public life. They warned that a life oriented toward fame and power was a danger to the soul. Epicurus’ motto was “live unnoticed.” He taught that tranquility and happiness were best found in quiet solitude with a few good friends.

Do what’s right, stay out of other people’s business, don’t insist and try not to attract attention to yourself.

The wisdom of the modest life was a departure from the ancient Greek tendency to celebrate bold heroes like Hercules. But Greek tragedy reveals those god-like heroes as ultimately unhappy. The excessive nature of arrogant pride tempts fate, while undermining virtue.

A similar idea can be found in ancient China: A Taoist allegory tells of a wise man who spent his time fishing by a peaceful river. The emperor heard about the wise sage and demanded that he come and serve in the Imperial court. The sage refused. He explained that if he gave up his simple life on the river, this would show that he was not really wise.

With all of this on the table, it may seem that there is something pernicious about TikTok or the memes and trends that emerge there. But there is nothing wrong with having a little fun. And as Grateful Dead’s “Scarlet Begonias” says, “once in a while you can get shown the light in the strangest of places, if you look at it right.”

That’s the spirit of my advice about the “very demure, very mindful” meme: Use this as a springboard for deeper reflection. Beware those missionaries of modest mindfulness who are trying to sell you something. Wisdom dwells deeper than a viral meme. But it is freely available to those who cultivate a modest and mindful life.

Read more at: https://www.fresnobee.com/opinion/readers-opinion/article291306790.html#storylink=cpy

Posted on

On the wisdom of not clinging to power

Fresno Bee, Feb. 18, 2024

We have entered an era of bumbling gerontocracy. The crusty old codgers clinging to power are embarrassing.

Consider the recent report of the special investigator in the Biden classified documents case. The report said that since Biden is a congenial old duffer, a jury would not convict him of mishandling official documents. The special counsel said, “Mr. Biden would likely present himself to a jury, as he did during our interview of him, as a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory… He is someone for whom many jurors will want to identify reasonable doubt. It would be difficult to convince a jury that they should convict him.”

This has been red meat for the “Let’s go Brandon” crowd. And the Biden backers claim it is a partisan hit job. But the other side is no better. Trump is accused of fomenting an insurrection, among other crimes. And left-leaning pundits have chronicled Trump’s gaffes and mental slips, including how he confused Nikki Haley with Nancy Pelosi, and his bizarre recent claim that liberals want to rename Pennsylvania.

In a better world, both candidates would step aside. This will be a depressing dumpster fire of an election year. But perhaps we can learn something along the way about leadership and power.

A good leader should be smart, truthful and thoughtful. He or she should be courageous and compassionate. And a leader should not cling to power.

Plato explained, over two thousand years ago, that the best leaders are usually the least eager to lead. Would-be tyrants lie, cheat, and cajole their way into power. Virtuous people will not play that ugly game.

Plato said that wise rulers must be compelled to rule by a sense of justice and duty. He concluded that the best rulers are those who are “most reluctant to govern.” This sounds bizarre and almost impossible. Can we really imagine a person who serves as a matter of duty, and not because they desire glory?

George Washington may provide a model. When asked to consider the presidency, Washington said he would rather stay home. He said, “it is my great and sole desire to live and die in peace and retirement, on my own farm.” But if he were called upon to serve, he said, “I hope I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain (what I consider the most enviable of all titles) the character of an honest man.”

Perhaps this was a kind of false modesty on Washington’s part. It is possible for a manipulative person to say “no” to power as a strategic ploy. They might deviously hope that a public display of humility will be persuasive.

But Washington’s writings reveal a man who was focused on questions of virtue. Washington wanted to be remembered as a man who dedicated his life to the service of his country with “an upright zeal.” This is how he put it in his Farewell Address, as he voluntarily left office after two terms at the age of 65.

Washington’s decision not to run for a third term established the basic norm of the two-term presidency. This norm was put into law after Franklin D. Roosevelt’s four-term presidency.

Scholars debate the reasons for Washington’s refusal to run for a third term. But most seem to think that he really did desire to retreat to a private life at Mount Vernon. The consensus view seems to be, as one scholar put it, “in turning away from further service, Washington established himself as a model of selfless leadership.”

Selfless leadership is a noble idea. The best leaders should be reluctant to serve — but do so willingly, out of a sense of duty. They should want to be known as honest people. And they should have the constancy of character, and orientation toward virtue, that Washington called upright zeal.

They should also possess wisdom. Wisdom is different from quickness of wit. Young people are quick and witty. But wisdom comes with age and experience, and with a mellowing of the passions.

So, the age of our leading candidates is not the only thing that matters. What matters more is whether these old-timers are wise and virtuous, and whether they insist on clinging to power.

Read more at: https://www.fresnobee.com/opinion/readers-opinion/article285541682.html#storylink=cpy

Posted on

Anxiety is the spice of life

Tranquility is often viewed as the goal of spiritual training. But serenity is not the only thing that matters in life. Conflict is productive. Struggle is exciting. And anxiety is the spice of life.

Arthur Brooks wrote an essay recently pointing out that suffering, unhappiness, and anxiety are unavoidable experiences. He was responding to the apparent growth of mental health disorders, including a recent increase in depression and anxiety. This is alarming. And I don’t intend to minimize the problem.

But there is some wisdom to be learned from the world’s wisdom traditions, and from how we imagine a good life. Here’s the point: life is difficult. The key to living well is not to find a peace place and to avoid conflict and struggle. Rather, the goal is to manage conflict and create a harmonious whole.

Dialing in the virtues

In his essay, Brooks asks us to see that our emotions are not regulated by simple on-off switches. Rather, they are like dials. They can be adjusted upward or downward. The goal of living well is to adjust these dials and to balance our emotions with one another.

I would add that this is also true of the virtues. The four Platonic virtues—justice, courage, moderation, and wisdom—are not binary switches. Rather, they are like dials that are adjusted in relation to the world. The virtues must also be balanced with each other. Aristotle reminds us that the key to happiness is to find the right amount of a virtue, at the right time, and in the right way.

A familiar example involves courage. Would we say that a criminal is couragous when he robs a bank? Not really. Courage does not occur in isolation. It must be connected to the other virtues. Sometimes courage needs to be dialed up: say when you need to defend what’s good and what’s true. But at other times, it needs to be dialed down: when you are selfish, resentful, and mean.

In the Greek tradition, wisdom helps us adjust the dials. But there is no recipe or rule that helps us figure out how best to adjust these dials. This is more art than science, which leads us to a culinary and aesthetic metaphor.

Cooking up wisdom

The challenge—and the fun—of adjusting our dials is obvious for anyone who is familiar with music or with cooking. Consider the process of cooking, eating, and drinking. The pleasures of dining involve contrasts and balance. Red wine is good with pungent cheeses. Hot chilis pair well with lime and sweets. A delicious meal involves the interplay of lots of flavors, textures, and smells. And these unfold over time—from the appetizer to desert.

Life is like a complex meal. There are spicy parts, and mellow times, salt and vinegar, sweetness and light. The key is balance. But also play and innovation.

So too with music. A single note is boring, as is a simple rhythm. Symphonic music and jazz demonstrate the joy and beauty of complex harmonizing. The bass line runs in contrast to the melody. The chords change. Those changes include dissonance, odd little grace notes, and tonic resolution. There are slow movements, staccato outbursts, and groovy backbeats. Sometimes there is a key change. Other times the bridge introduces a whole new concept.

What if we viewed our lives as musical compositions? We would strive for a complex balance of fast and slow, resolution and dissonance. Sometimes life is marked by sad blue notes. Other times it rings like a bold major chord. The goal is to weave it all together with a sense of harmony.

Harmony v. tranquility

The goal of life is not, then, to rest quietly, serenely, and in peace. Some spiritual traditions do seem to point in that direction. We might imagine a monk alone on a mountaintop, sitting in quiet contemplation.

But that vision is other-worldly, and inhuman. It takes us to a summit far removed from the joys and the sorrows, the anxieties and loves of real human life. A life well-lived includes fear, sorrow, and grief. Those are necessarily components of a life that includes ambition, love, and compassion. The key is to dial these things up in the right way and in the right amounts.

If you love others and yourself, there will be anxiety and sadness. Love exposes us. When others hurt, you hurt as well. This is appropriate, and real. If you love yourself, there will also be anxiety. Our goals and ambitions matter. It is good to feel proud of what you’ve achieved and who you are. It is also right to feel resentful when the world turns against you. And it is appropriate to feel sad, when the world disappoints.

The challenge of a life well-lived is to weave anxiety and sadness into a harmonious whole. Life includes a variety of ingredients: joy and worry, sorrow and pride, love and grief. We don’t control everything that life gives us. But we can adjust the dials. Every life will include substantial amounts of bitter seasoning.  The goal is not to stop eating, or to live in quiet serenity. Rather, we ought to aim to create a symphony of the sweet and the spicy.